Dyslexic's Diary PAGE_7 - Drawing and Visualization

Back from festive holidays. Hope you all had a good time.

Previously, I have talked about how certain subjects, those depending on written language, long  descriptive sentences, rote memorization, were difficult for me. There were other subjects like say Drawing, Science, Geometry, Geography those I came naturally, I would rather explain problem-solutions by drawing than writing or speaking. I used to sketch weird things since early childhood, probably ideas that I used to keep thinking up on. Pappa used to look at my fingers and say you would become an artist when you grow up. Though drawing was only good enough for conveying my message but the sketches were definitely not beautiful, my drawing class notebook used to have a funny element to them, which luckily my teacher liked - but I sucked in coloring and my friends used to point that out - that after doing a good work I mess up with colors.

I appeared for Elementary exam (I guess 6th or 7th std) , after finishing my paper, the examiner asked me to draw for girl sitting behind me. I didn’t pass that but the girl did!

Pictures helped me understand much faster, Science, Geography and Geometry have those a lot and hence were the subjects I liked and could do well in.

Another aspect is I “think” in pictures (this is also part of various learning styles which I will write about later in the series). Not only still pictures, but I can manipulate those images in my head, rotate, invert, mirror, transform and modify. That’s really a very powerful gift that was found to be useful much later; firstly, in Jr College with Calculus, Organic Chemistry, Physics, Biology to a certain degree but most critically in Engineering.

First year of Engineering had two Engineering Drawing subjects, D1 and D2 as we used to call them - the most dreaded ones after Applied Mechanics for most of the students. I used to hear stories of difficulty levels from seniors, cousins, etc. and how certain submissions can NOT be done and a thing called GT (Glass Tracing) was a must. GT involves taking a bucket, with a 40 watt light bulb in it, covered with a large glass sheet/panel, then taking completed drawing submission by someone good and placing over the glass and then placing your blank sheet and trace out the lines exactly - it’s like a manual line photocopy.

I NEVER needed that!

I had missed a few initial lectures of D1 (probably ill) so lagged and somehow managed to pass the exam. Also, was definitely not among the favorites of the professors too.

In the second semester, with D2, which involved complex 3D drawing, with Top, Side, Front views, perspective, birds eye, missing view, development of surfaces and I could go on. I know many who were simply terrified by D2 but it was ultra simple for me. All the things listed were simply transformations which I could perform in my head and have a general idea of the solution and then it was simply penciling on paper with exact dimensions.

Still wasn’t noticed by the professors (Nakhate and Dingare). Once they conducted a mid-sem surprize test, it was difficult I guess, I think I was the first one to leave the room. I gave the answer sheets to the profs, they looked at each other and one exclaimed in a sarcastically “झेपला नाही का ?” (“was it difficult?”); though I felt sad by the prejudiced comment, I politely said, “No, I have completed it”. With a rather surprised look, they checked the solutions and then asked “Did you know the questions already?” I said “No” and left. That incident actually acted as a positive reinforcement, I realized that what I was thinking about myself being different (and at-times being way better at something than others) was true. That day onwards the profs’ behaviour towards me changed :)

In the final exam of D2, there was one problem, with a twist and was very difficult for me to solve; I solved it but with just a few minutes left to the final bell (and I out of low-confidence), I showed it to our class topper who was in row next to me, his facial expressions changed and I realized he had missed it. I think I got pretty high marks, probably within the top few, something to be proud academically - which was not usual for me.

This special ability helped me in other so called “difficult” subjects like Applied Mechanics, Strength of Materials, which involved application of science of motion, strength, to various situations, objects, materials, structures. The visualization ability enabled me to “SEE” forces, torques, velocities in action - which was kind of hard to tell others but helped me solving problems.

There was one incident which I haven’t yet forgotten. Based on on Applied Mechanics, I was conducting a thought experiment. What would happen when a bullet is shot from the back of the aeroplane in exact opposite direction with exact same speed of the aeroplane. I asked and told friends/room-mates that it would fall straight down (vertically). No one believed and I was mocked/teased and a few also joked behind my back :( (one well-wisher told me that). I could not convince friends in-spite of using simple equations. That hurt me a lot then - the fact that I am still writing about it shows how much. Many years later, I accidentally came across an experiment conducted by myth-busters about same concept, it proved I was right. (I even posted about it here - https://www.facebook.com/virendra.mane/posts/10206581610649984). The fact that Mythbusters had to take this up was it must have been a much talked about puzzle to be proved practically.

This all gets extended towards my interests in (Astro) Physics, Cosmology; Theory of Relativity is extremely difficult to visualize though that 2D trampoline with heavy ball curving “space” is what people think is what actually happens, but it is way more complex than that - I think I have been able to visualize it with very intense brain efforts a few times - after understanding myself I don’t think about it again - and frankly it's impossible for me to explain in words to others.

Today when I look back, this visualization ability has been a boon to me, in my academics, career (programming), business and general life. Though I still feel under/un-appreciated I am coping with it much better now.

If you see someone like this, do talk to her/him and try to give a conducive environment to do better in.

I am always available for sharing my experience and be of assistance in some way

(Sharing to create awareness about Specific Learning Difficulties (#Dyslexia, #Dysgraphia, #Dyscalculia) and a bit of #ADD / #ADHD, hope it helps if you see someone with similar traits)

🙏Viru

Dyslexic's Diary PAGE_6 - Response to my blog posts

My past 4 posts which mostly shared my childhood experiences have resulted in a big response. I am getting messages from similar people, parents, teachers as well as a few children.

Each of them have urged me to share more, which I shall continue doing. I will eventually write about real life situations of others whose stories I know due to being close friends/relatives.

A small example how sharing helps; the school teacher who had supported my different way (when dyslexia was not known) was in Pune in summer. We met and I talked about how his support helped me then and how I realized I was this after Tare Jamin Par, my teacher said he too was different and he was fortunate to get a teacher who similarly helped him. And then we kept on talking for next 3 odd hours about we saw world, things, processes, and how being different was actually a strength.

Growing up with dyslexia creates a severe shame in minds of children, so at times my post / examples may seem like self pity or boastful - but they are not. I am an happy individual and have done much more than anyone would have thought about me when I was little.

🙏वीरू

Dyslexic's Diary PAGE_5 - Few resources for parents and teachers

Dyslexia is a lifelong companion, hence my diary has potentially unlimited number of pages. Today, I am going to share a series of short clips. I hope these would help teachers and parents understand it better and spot a child early.

1. Dyslexics Intro https://youtu.be/8-M9uEYzDAQ
2. About Dyslexia https://youtu.be/DgHDQeZ5QuA
3. Dyslexic Strengths https://youtu.be/d4VRjQnBoWM
4. Dyslexic Challenges https://youtu.be/_t9IsQQH7WI
5. Inclusive Classrooms https://youtu.be/NdrBpOV67DY
6. Identification https://youtu.be/xOI78tkN0rQ
7. Richard Branson (Virgin Atlantic) shares his thoughts https://youtu.be/-OZyXZ__5TU

No two Dyslexic children are going to be alike, not all of them will have same strengths or challenges, each of the child will have a different response and coping mechanism.

So while Dyslexia is a "Gift" and the narrative of many greats being Dyslexic, don't expect "your" child, having this condition, to be doing something great. Expecting itself is NOT a good idea in my opinion for any child.

Let the child do what s/he wants, be around, understand and support. Know that there would be obstacles on the way, help him/her climb those.

Dyslexic's Diary PAGE_4 - Language versus subjects those can be visualized

As mentioned in the previous post, language subjects were a problem in school, especially grammar and certain spellings. Currently, I only know a bit of nouns and adjectives, whatever I learned by brute force somehow then have forgotten all.

Spellings like Sweat/Sweet confused me and thought both to be the same, always felt ‘hight’ was the correct one for ‘height’; recieve, percieve, and such were other ones which involved ‘ie’-‘ei’ inversion.

I hated reading aloud when asked to do so in class, I used to be afraid so I adapted to somehow read in a slow monotonous style; that still continues. Some teachers had made negative remark but it didn’t affect me as very few in the class read well. At home Pappa used to say reading aloud helps in remembering, which I never followed.

Like, reading, writing was bad, I mean not just handwriting, but essay writing - I simply couldn’t write page after page of “what if I were PM” and similar things by imagining. When I tried to improvise by writing something funny it was discouraged / non-appreciated by teachers (the writing style that I have today).

Until 5th standard, I before semester exams I used to invariably fall ill and miss a few papers, many times I was made to write those papers, during the holidays. I think I had fear for exams then, though it (falling ill) subsided afterwards. Then I started getting light fever after last paper of important exams.

Later, in my career, I developed my own style of writing, especially professional documents and mails. My (foreign) bosses/clients appreciated that several times, explicitly saying how my mails convey precise message in the least amount of words, or how the documents are crystal clear in explaining things. Computes, word processors have been the best thing in my life - now I don’t have to worry about spelling and handwriting.

I got to know much later that I probably have Dyslexia (reading difficulty), Dysgraphia (writing difficulty) as well as Dyscalculia (maths difficulty) of mild nature though.

While struggling with these subjects, others in which visualization was possible (science, geography, etc.) was bit easy, saying ‘a bit easy’ because our general academic structure is focused towards remembering things (definitions, names, places, etc.) and not ‘doing/trying’ hands-on.

After learning about the basic structure of atoms, as well as knowing about light being comprised of different colours. I clearly remember sitting under a mango tree in our plot, and pondering what might be happening at the level of atoms when light strikes them and is reflected - what exactly is a colour of a material as all the atoms and molecules are comprised of the same particles. Didn’t get an answer though, not a genius ;)

I mentioned about an astronomy book in earlier posts, it had talked about Black Holes and how it bends light. One of the drawings to explain light was similar to what the lens diagrams in 6-7th standard. It showed one star appearing as two due to a black hole in front of it. In the 90s, there was no internet and Hubble Telescope was just launched but had its own lens problems being corrected. I too was focusing on engineering and career/job while still having that diagram in the back of my mind and wondered something different should be visible instead of two stars. So after one such ‘intense’ thought experiment session I scribbled (in my Palm Pilot in 1998 or so) something I thought should be observed.

Attached is the screen-shot of that note I have in Computer-Outlook synced to Phone, it says ‘the star should look like a ring or with a dim center’ - I was a bit wrong, such perfect alignments or Star - Black Hole - Earth’ are difficult/near impossible, but they actually happen on a larger scale - my understanding was limited then.


The effect is called as Einstein's Ring - first was observed only in 1988. I was very excited when I came across the photos over the internet after I revived my cosmology/astro-physics interest. (PS: That date in the note of 7 Feb 2011 was due to a data migration error when I switch to a new phone!)

Gravitationally lensed galaxy SDP.81

taken by ALMA By ALMA, CC BY 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=39499557

The dark center is due to a foreground massive galaxy which is NOT visible in this wavelength.

Similarly, the images below show other such rings with central foreground galaxies (having same gravitational effect as black holes).

Some observed Einstein rings by SLACS:
By NASA - https://hubblesite.org/contents/news-releases/2005/news-2005-32.html, 
Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=34045368

Solutions used to (even now do) play like a video in my mind, it is sometimes difficult to understand except for people who have such learning/thinking styles. Another instance I remember was from my Sr. Kg/1st std time (I remember the age because I know where I lived then, hence can deduce the approx years). Pappa had brought a salt shaker (probably novelty then), the salt was not used to be refined then, and during monsoon lumps used to form inside. Parents used to open and break them. I suggested them to empty half of the shaker and put a marble inside, so whenever it is shaken the marble would break the lumps and it worked.

To be continued...

Viru

Dyslexic's Diary PAGE_3 - Being “Different / वेगळा” continued

[For people who don’t know me - I did my engineering (Computer Science) from MIT Pune, was in the US for a few years, returned home by choice and started business, running the company for 20 years now, have worked in extremely complex systems, have few patents. And I believe I am fortunate to get here]

In Sixth standard, I failed in Math in the first unit test of the year, got 6 / 20. Aai was pretty angry and scolded me a lot. She then found a teacher to give me private tuition, I hated those i) kids usually don’t like teachers coming home ii) it reduced my play time. Anyway, it did not change anything, I continued to struggle, mostly in Arithmetic/Algebra.

• As mentioned in previous post, memorizing tables was difficult so I found a trick, started doing additions in the background while saying the tables aloud.
• Multiplications, started doing approximations, or some other shortcuts - say, for 16x12 = 160+32 or 17x9 = 170 - 17, etc.
• Subtractions and Divisions were horror then and are even now

In Ninth standard, Raju (Rajiv Binwade) moved to Shrirampur and became my best friend for life. Once he saw me struggling with fraction multiplication, that 6/7 * 8/3, I thought it was done like (7*8)/(6*3), I still vividly remember surprise on Raju’s face. He took me aside and taught me how to do that - remember that was 9th std.

While working on squares, I saw a pattern and came up with pretty easy way of finding square of 2 digit numbers. See the image on right.
I didn’t share this with math teacher though, didn’t have confidence, probably didn't even share with friends, instead talked to Makwana sir who had been supporting me since 8th, he appreciated and told me to come and talk to him for any such things. 

There’s nothing great in this method, it’s just (a+b)^2 = a^2 + b^2 + 2ab, which I realized later while showing this to my kids when they were doing squares.

Glad that calculators are handy these days!

***Note: Govt has many provisions for children with SpLDs and allowing the use of calculators in exams is one of them***

I did not study well, rather did not know how to study in a structured manner. Don’t remember what I did but do remember watching the complete test match against Pakistan just a few days prior to board exams, we lost by a tiny margin, Sunil Gavaskar played great and got out on 96 in last innings chasing.

I have included my SSC mark-list in the pictures, check the marks. I would like to parents to look at their own mark-lists and see what they are doing now in 40s and how much of it is due to those high/low marks, and/or are they doing what they planned/dreamed they would be doing in the future. I do not want to preach about the marks, but would like to suggest to the parents, who feel their child is not like others and are expecting/pushing her/him to do-better/excel by working ‘harder’, to exercise caution, reduce expectations and listen to the child. All the child wants/needs is appreciation and acceptance from parents. Just try to read the faces of children when they are telling the exam results.

Well, after getting to 11th, something inside me changed, I started liking the subjects, may be because History, and language grammar wasn’t there. More importantly the subjects started coming closer to my abilities of visualizing, may be not all - inorganic chemistry was still not so easy. Calculus, Physics, Biology, Organic Chemistry were extremely simple and I started spending some time daily (not more than 2-3 hours) after college solving problems.

To be continued...

Dyslexics Diary PAGE_2 - Being Different / वेगळा

(Writing to create awareness about Specific Learning Difficulties (Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, Dyscalculia) and a bit of ADD / ADHD, hope it helps if you see someone with similar traits)

Over the last few years, when I meet old friends one thing that I hear often  is some saying “वीरू वेगळा होता”, Raju, Sujit, Atul, Harsha, Makawana Sir, Shrenik, Kamy, Gautya, and many others have said so. Though it feels good to hear that now, growing with the feeling of being different was not so pleasant/comfortable. I have said a few times that I don’t have many good memories of school days and it's probably the reason.

I had a pretty normal childhood, was all fun and play like most privileged kids. Till 7th - 8th I used to play with other children of similar age, games like marbles (गोट्या), टिक्के, गज-गज, hide and seek, chess and other board games, etc. No cricket though for some reason (which I love).

Since early years I had preferred playing alone more, in mud, doing stuff like baking miniature bricks, building mud homes, dams, rivers, making furnace, playing with fire - boiling/burning various items, experimenting with cement concrete, learning the mixture of water, sand, planing electricity distribution but poles made from खराटा sticks and wires from strings. Made a circus tent with movable characters (by strings), a work in progress, but was destroyed by neighboring kid.

In around 1st std, I had designed a railway that could run using steam, also had designed people (robots) who could walk. Had a notebook maintained with wheel diameter, rail track width (that notebook got thrown away:(). All to be made from metal sheet (पत्रा), I was after Pappa to get me a mini-welding machine. Had tickets made, routes and stations decided - and drawn on शहाबाद floor with Pop’s ink pen. Also had decided to get it inaugurated by Indira Gandhi and dreamt of a photo in the newspaper. Of course most of it was childish, and my Pop always said he will get the welding machine ‘next time’.

The fact was I could visualize all these ideas, designs, movements of parts, forces, and a lot in my mind but didn't or couldn’t express/speak to others. I could/can see solutions, in motion, manipulate objects/processes in mind (AND I AM NOT CRAZY!).

I also liked opening things to see how they worked, the toy camera in the attached photo was probably one of the first that I remember, I didn’t want to break it open myself so once when Pappa was taking a nap, I placed it near his hand, so that when it moved the camera would fall and break. Had to repeat that a few times and then blamed Pop for breaking but was happy to see how the film was and how it moved and enlarged via the lenses.

I enjoyed reading a lot (I am not ‘dyslexic’ per se or could be on milder side), I had a liking of science, more of Physics and Astronomy. Being in a small town had its own problems - availability of books. There was this one book on astro-physics in town library which was only read by me. The library folks then made an exception and let me keep it for a long time and issued other books as well.

In mid-late teens I became a fan of Dr. Narendra Dabholkar and ANS (अंधश्रद्धा निर्मूलन समिती) - so his followers know what one faces in society. I was fortunate that my parents didn’t oppose me about my thoughts.

But there was a problem when it came to certain academics aspects, I couldn’t do math quickly, couldn’t memorize tables after 6/7, rote/learning by heart was nearly impossible, remembering dates and relations in history was terrifying - I used to get taunted sometimes for these and sometimes totally ignored. In 6th std, I had failed a math unit test and had attempted to cheat by taking a piece of paper with a 3 line definition of some geography lesson (didn't use it for another reason).

There were a few teachers who liked me and for many I was non-existent. In 10th (HSC) I had severe doubts about being able to pass in History and English.

All this had started making me an introvert; I used to get frustrated/irritated when others didn’t get such a simple thing I was telling/talking about.

To be continued...

-------

Some of the crazy things I did:

1. Making electromagnet by winding copper wire around core extracted from Tube light choke and inserting the terminals directly into socket - was lucky to have not died, the home main fuse burnt. I was saved as the copper wire had enamel which I knew nothing about then
2. Trying to make “neon” light by trapping kerosene ‘gas’ in a glass bottle and trying to pass A/C current through it. (could have exploded if there had been a spark)
3. Being curious about a plastic cap behind TV’s voltage stabilizer and opened it to find a springy shiny thing - which I pressed - and later realized I was 3-4 feet away from the TV, don’t remember how! (It was actually a live fuse)
4. Made a pinhole camera in 7th (first image below), and followed up by a pretty neat, compact B/W film camera which had shutter (rubber band powered), viewfinder, roll forwarding mechanism, a tiny window to see the number on the negative (yes, negatives had numbers printed on them), had a dark room, photo developing solutions and all - it was all hands on learning - so the initial efforts failed and then I moved on to other things, like Electronics

Dyslexics Diary PAGE_1 - Precursor

I have been meaning to write about this since long but wasn’t able to decide on the form of the series. Finally decided to start without much planning.

The trigger was a visit to my home at Shrirampur a couple of days ago.

While trying to find bits and pieces of childhood memories I found my Xth standard English notebook, it survived because I used it for writing cricket scores.

I studied in an English Medium school which a couple of friends confirmed messed both our English and Marathi. Anyway that’s not the topic, I have attached a couple of photos with the remarks by the teacher. “Very poor handwriting”, spelling was bad too and (essay) writing skills worse.

That just brought back memories which I had buried down in dark corners of my mind; such remarks were not uncommon for me in certain subjects (Marathi/Hindi/English/History and even Maths). I was traumatized by English then and lived the year in constant fear of failing in a English and History), and anything that needed rote memorization of definitions.

Parents, few teachers used to say I am clever/intelligent which I knew but that didn’t show up in normally acceptable ways (marks) which used to make me feel lost, insulted, confused. But one thing for sure was that I knew I was different, way different than everyone else around.

I struggled in school in certain ways, sailed 11th and 12th easily, and did pretty well in Engineering (with certain hurdles still).

That continued all the way in my following career, the feeling of being “different” bothered me until I was able to convert that in to my strengths. Much later in life I was able to identify what it was, again accidentally.

Dyslexia, as it is commonly known, is actually one of several Specific Learning Difficulties/Disabilities (SpLD) that about 10% (or even more) children have. I had Dyslexia, Dyscalculia and Dysgraphia all with mild severity, I suffered a bit but didn’t break down as there was no social/academic pressure as in today’s times, but also saw a loved one severely affected by it.

I am sure you must have seen many such people (school friends, relatives) who are like this, many are labeled lazy, dumb, or even worse. Usually they drop out of schools around 8/9th standards. Some get into bad company / develop bad habits.

I would be sharing such experiences, in an attempt to create awareness in my limited friend list - hoping this could result in helping even a single child - would be good.